My #1 Responsibility As a Wife

I am between stages, I think, as a woman of God. Titus 2 gives an outline regarding the proper behavior of Christian wives/mothers.

The conduct described above is of course virtuous for all women, regardless of age. Still, I find myself between ages. At 42, I’m hardly a young woman, yet there are plenty older than me and from whom I can still learn. So, I do my best to advise those younger than me. Sometimes the “age” has less to do with physical years, but rather spiritual years and maturity and unfortunately genuine Titus 2 older women are difficult to come by. I thank the sexual revolution for that. But I digress.

If I could pinpoint my #1 responsibility to my husband, and thus advise other women concerning the same, it may be different from what one might expect.

Yes, having a home which is clean, comfortable, and peaceful is important. Yes, loving him and the children are important. Yes, wholesome meals and meeting his physical needs are important. Being kind, gentle, and respectful are important. The fruits of the Spirit should be present in every Christian marriage, exhibited by both spouses.

But that isn’t my top priority.

My top priority is that from which all the above virtues naturally flow.

If a Christian woman wants to be a godly wife and true helpmeet to her husband, she encourages, and allows, and does everything she can to see to it that he is able to spend adequate time alone with God, in study and prayer. The God-assigned task as head of the household is a serious responsibility for which he will be held accountable. How can he possibly lead with Godly wisdom if he is lacking in true, intimate fellowship with God? Even if he doesn’t understand or take his role seriously, a woman belonging to the Lord should encourage him in it.

Of course, a woman who is deliberate and faithful with her own private time with the Lord understands how precious and important that time is.

The days are evil and we simply cannot expect to fight the good fight of faith and remain standing if we do not spend time in the secret place of the Most High.

Yes, if a woman loves her husband, this should be her priority for the sake of the entire household.

Maranatha! ❤

50s Day and a Painful Step

My little guy had a big day.

First, he dressed up in 50s style for the 50th day of school.


Posing with his friend who also goes to our church.

Then he came home, changed into his muck boots and proceeded to play outside. A few minutes later I hear a wail. Poor fella stepped on a nail that went through his boot and into his foot.

Praise God there wasn’t much blood but it’s still quite painful. He’s up to date on his tetanus shot. Naturally he’s concerned about being able to trick or treat on Monday. 🙂

It’s not a big deal for most families 

But for us to be able to go to the public pool and actually have fun with no incidents is such a huge blessing!  Furthermore,  I took both kids by myself.  

I seriously had thought our days of having fun as a family were over. …or at least on hold until Beauty got out of puberty.  

Today, though, we had a wonderful time together at the pool. Perhaps only parents of special needs kids can understand how overjoyed this makes me. 

The Attack on Men

Our men are under attack! T.V. shows, movies, pop culture….for years they have been changing what we expect of our men, fathers and husbands. Often seen as buffoons or clowns, or over-worked businessmen who have no time for their families. Now what decent men are left have to stand by while their wives and daughters share a bathroom with any male who claims to identify as a woman.It is a shame, really, but why is it happening?

I’m so stinkin’ proud!

I did not post much on Friday because we were busy as a family.

The highlight of the day concerns our daughter.  You may recall she is 12 and “special needs”. She has multiple diagnosis, all cognitive in nature. Physically she is healthy and strong-Praise the Lord-but her IQ was tested to be 55. In some ways, she is “further behind” than her 6-year-old brother. I use quotes because, while these labels are helpful in getting her the appropriate assistance, they do NOT define who she is as a cherished girl created by God. She faces many challenges and as both her mother and her home school teacher, I am challenged right along with her. The whole family is.

Anyway, one of her struggles is with sensory issues. On the one hand, she SEEKS deep pressure input and “hard work” (swimming, hanging from the monkey bars, shoveling are all good activities to help balance her nervous system), she also AVOIDS other stimuli such as loud crowds. A HUGE challenge we have is with her hair. Here is a picture from her 12th birthday:

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That long, curly hair is a battleground! She cannot stand for anyone to touch her head/hair. Trying to shampoo it and then comb out the tangles is a war I reserve only for Saturday nights (for church the next day). It stays a horrible tangled mess the rest of the week. She has never been to a salon because 1. In the past, we didn’t want to disturb the beautiful blonde curls (she used to let me fix it) and 2. We figured some battles are better left at home and not out in public……..UNTIL TODAY! When we got ready to leave to do some shopping this morning, her hair was quite tangled. Her dad coaxed her into letting me try to do something with it, but it was really bad. We had had enough. We told her it would be best if we let someone cut it, just a little. Once she realized we didn’t mean as short as her dad and brother’s, she agreed.

So, finally, at 12 years old, she had her first visit to the salon!

She LOVED having her hair shampooed (who doesn’t?) and was so patient and cooperative during the entire process. She kept asking if she could come back! The stylist was very nice and understanding as well.

Here is her new, “grown-up” hairstyle that she now doesn’t want us to touch because we will “mess it up”. Hee Hee

jan 29 2016

The stylist straightened it in hopes it would give us a couple of days without tangles. However, after tonight’s bath it was a little damp and the curls came back. It was super cute with the curls too! She seems very happy with it and I am hopeful she will once again allow me to comb and style it, since it won’t be so painful.

I am so stinkin’ proud of this kid!!!!

‘Refused’

“Refused the flu shot” is what was written in large, bold letters at the top of my daughter’s (I call her Beauty) medical record the other day.

We’ve been taking her to Cincinnati’s Children Hospital for her check-up evaluations and screenings. When the nurse called us back, and before weighing her, she asked if Beauty had the flu shot. I said no. She asked, “Do you want us to give her one?”. I said, “Um, no thanks”. It was while the nurse was measuring Beauty’s height that I glimpsed at her file and saw the nurse’s note.

Perhaps I am knit-picking, and I admit I have little trust in the pediatric medical field (at least in what I have use of them for-which is not an actual illness), but this note really rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe it was where I was freshly aggravated at reading those stories of parents losing their children because a hospital accused them of medical negligence.

Beauty is 10 and has never had the flu shot and has never had the flu. Children we know get the shot every fall and they also get the flu before “flu season” is up. I never get the flu shot. Our son, 4, has never had it. Hubs just got one, but that is because he accepted a position at the hospital-sponsored health club and had to. We are physically healthy. Beauty was enrolled in public school for one entire school year plus two months of another. Our family was the sickest during those months than we have ever been, though not with anything serious. Since I brought her back home, we have not been sick once all winter.

Honestly, a small note saying something like, “Flu shot offered. Parent opted out”, would have be sufficient. The large, black handwriting at the top of the form, and underlined, hit a nerve. When you also home school a special needs child, one learns to be wary, even if you do everything properly.