Before I began “looking up”

Before Jesus completely transformed me and I began to “look up” for His return, I was a movie junkie. In fact, I once managed a video store. I didn’t get to the theaters very often, but every movie that came out to rent….I watched. Honestly, every. single. one. I knew everything there was to know about most of the movies people came in to rent. What can I say, I loved movies. Passionately.

Not too long ago I would’ve been chomping at the bit in anticipation of this movie:


Angelina Jolie was my girl, back in the day, and I had a particular fancy for scary and mysterious movies.

All the while I would’ve told you I was a Christian,and I would’ve meant it and believed it. I was. 

But I was still very much attached to things of this world, completely oblivious that I was being courted, manipulated and deceived by the enemy and that he was having a field day with my lackadaisical Christianity.

This was before Jesus stepped in and renewed my mind.

Now, it is different. I am different. In fact, I watch MAYBE two hours of t.v. a WEEK and the last movie I saw, well, I cannot remember the title but I do remember coming away from it thinking that was two hours of my life that I am never getting back. Two hours that could’ve been better well-spent.

Is this to say that I no longer enjoy myself, that I can no longer be entertained? Am I saying if you go see “Maleficent” you are not a Christian? Of course not.

I am simply saying I am different. Seriously, it is an act of God that I no longer desire to see the next thing coming out of Hollywood.

Now when I see ads of Maleficent, or any of the other blockbuster hits, my stomach churns-tightens. All I can see is a tool with which the enemy deceives so many. Slap the name “Disney” on it and that makes it automatically okay. It must be family-friendly and safe for your kids, right? Not so, I’m afraid. Sure, there may not be any profanity, nudity or sexual content but that does not make it safe. Look at the image above again. What we have here is a demon-woman, where the forces of evil are celebrated. People get a thrill out of the “dark side”. I used to be one of them.  The same goes for all these super hero movies that have made a comeback in recent years. I was once a huge X-Men fan as well. Now all I see is propaganda; an effort to brain wash society into believing two falsehoods: evolution and man has within himself the ability to be like God, with supernatural abilities. Yes, the “entertainment” industry is a very effective tool of the enemy’s. I don’t even have to mention mainstream music, do I?

The point of this post is not to look down my nose at Christians who still find movies like Maleficent enjoyable, rather it is meant as a kind of personal testimony of how Jesus has changed me and of the work He is doing in me. HE IS NOT FINISHED WITH ME YET! I am still imperfect and if not for the grace of God and the redemptive work of Jesus-I would be doomed to an eternity in the lake of fire. But I finally “Get It”. I want to bring Him glory and live a holy life, BECAUSE of what He did. BECAUSE He loves me, I love Him and do not want to dishonor His work on the cross by continuing to dabble in the things of this world.

Yes, I can still have fun. I love roller coasters! I love working along side my husband in the garden. I love seeing my children smile and laugh. I love to be silly, read a good book and even watch a wholesome, uplifting video from time to time. Living a holy life does not equate a dull life. In fact, Jesus said He came to give us an ABUNDANT life, and He does indeed! We just need to let go of what the world finds entertaining and find the true joy in life’s simple, beautiful pleasures.

And to be perfectly honest, NO, I do not think people who love and follow Jesus should spend the money God has made them stewards of on the evil filth coming out of Hollywood. What fellowship has light with darkness? Why give evil a foothold? Why make available your hearts and minds to the one that wishes to destroy you? Why taint the name of Jesus by professing Him on Sunday morning but paying homage to satan on Saturday night? 

Just something to consider……

A Lonely Walk

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Do you ever wish you could turn off your mind? I mean, do you think too much?  I have always been introspective and analytical….cerebral.  Until recently, this personality trait has been no more than a nibbling in the back of my mind. It was controllable.  It wasn’t until I was born again that my mind has gone into overload.

Allow me to explain. I publically acknowledged Jesus as my Lord and Savior and was baptized when I was eleven years old. The next 25 years consisted first of “Bible beating” my peers, to wandering away and buying into the lies of political correctness and extreme feminism in my college years, to sleep walking through my mid-twenties and early thirties. It literally was only recently that- during a depressed, dark time- I surrendered all and understood what it was for Jesus not to just be Savior, but Lord. While I cannot give you an exact date, it has certainly been within the last six months that I began to understand what it means to be born again and to walk in the Spirit while abiding in Jesus.

16 I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. Galatians 5

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.  And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12 (emphasis mine)

I look at everything differently now and I cannot shut off my mind!  Even while performing the mundane tasks of home making and motherhood, I am thinking. Sometimes I cannot help myself but to bounce some of my thoughts off others. Ya know, get their input. I call this intellectual/theological banter. They call it annoying.

This is where the walk gets lonely. Even the Christians in my life cannot see the value in setting aside a few minutes to think about/pontificate issues that do not directly relate to their busy schedules. The lawn must be mowed, car washed, groceries bought, fill in the blank. When I ask what they are thinking about when they do these necessary, but mundane, tasks everyone of them will say…”nothing. I’m just focusing on what I am doing or what I need to do next.”

I cannot imagine this….going through life with thoughts no deeper than what lays before me at that moment or what is next on my To-Do List. I’m not necessarily saying this is wrong. I just cannot fathom it. Even in during my decade of sleep-walking through life…my mind was churning with random thoughts that had little to nothing to do with my chores. I understand every Christian is given a measure of faith and individual gifts to make up the Body of Christ. However, it does get lonely when the thoughts I deem worthy of mental energy are shrugged off by my friends and family, and what they want to talk about is-in my mind-a waste of time.

For example: I am told, “I don’t have time to consider what is happening in Syria, or the Gosnell trial or the riots in Sweden. There’s nothing I can do about any of it, so why bother thinking/talking about it? Sure, times are evil and we are in what must be the last days but I cannot spend much time contemplating prophecy-what’s going to happen is going to happen.” (Which is basically, saying to me, shut up cause my life is more full than yours cause obviously you have too much time on your hands if you are thinking about current events and theological issues.) Meanwhile, I am thinking (but I don’t say so, cause that would be way too rude and hurtful and while I am honest, I do not lack tact), “why should I care about the latest knick-knack you picked up at Hobby Lobby or how you’ve got this and this to do or what so-and-so said about so-and-so? Don’t you know we could be raptured at any moment? THIS is what consumes your thoughts?”.

Ah, we each have our own walk and we must all work out our salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12). Still, I wonder-am I nuts for giving a hoot about current events and topics pertaining to God’s Word (while not in “church”)?  Some times I feel as though I am beating my head against a wall wishing those I love would have that “light bulb” moment that Jesus is about to return. We are living in exciting and important times. Why do so few people “get” this? Lots of people say they do, but I cannot help but doubt it because if they did they wouldn’t be so concerned about the day-to-day but instead be excited and looking up as they went about their day.